When you look at it from a North American perspective, you save all your vacation days and use them for your India trip. Your North American friends are jealous that you get one month of Vacation to the exotic land of India! Many of my Indian friends feel that they are stressed when they are in India and it is not actually a vacation. I do agree to this thought and it is true for most of the times I visited home. When my friends come back from one of these trips they swear that they are not going back for say, another 5 years.

Most of the time, average IT Indian families plan their trips around some event that is happening back home – like brother’s wedding, dad’s Birthday, sister having a baby. On some unlucky situations, they go back home because one of the family members is seriously ill or someone passed away. When you combine these events with visits to relatives houses etc. you do not have much room to build in your own agenda of a trip to your favorite hill resort. How can you consider this a vacation if your agenda is dictated like this?

There is a lot of complaining after coming back – oh, we didnt get to do all the things that we wanted to, it was too hot, the relatives were whiny and bad to me, India has changed so much, it is too crowded, all the shops do not take credit cards…..it goes on. What I have found out in all these years is that, even though you do not get to plan your time off, and there are a million other things that you do not enjoy there, there is an undeniably STRONG relationship between you and your homeland. It just cannot be explained in words. You go back so that you can be YOURSELF.

The feeling of belonging and being ones own self is something we forget very easily and conveniently. The last time I went, I had a very stressful trip owing to the fact that it was my children’s first visit and they got sick way too often. But that does not stop me from thinking about my next trip and I am already looking forward to my next one in August. Again, this time it is my Dad’s 60th birthday event that is dictating the dates and places, but hey, I would still take it.

Do let me know how your visits to your home land are like, when is your next visit and what you are looking forward to do in that trip, your thoughts on  my musings………..

Oh, by the way it is not like I never complained anything about my trips and vacations to India. I did do that when I was younger, naive and did not have the big perspective on life and dwelled on immediate pleasures and rewards of life. I have learnt to think of the big picture of life through my own experiences as well as from others.

It took us a few reads before we noticed the red balloon flying high in the Good Night Gorilla book. The balloon is flying towards the sky and is seen in almost all the pages. The mouse trying to drag the banana is a super hit with my daughter. She laughs hard when the Giraffe steps on the thread tied to the banana and the mouse is trying to get him off of the thread and pull the banana. When Mrs.Zookeeper says Good Night, she is expecting only one in return from her husband but she gets quite a few of them. My daughter loves to match the ‘good nights’ to the source. “…..this one is the Elephant because it is big! This is the mouse – see…..it’s small”. She also loves the surprised eyes of the lady in the dark and imitates that expression every time we read it. 

I love the Cat in the Hat book. The words rhyme, repeat…my daughter easily falls asleep reading that one. She has seen the movie too and enjoyed it – but I thought she had a different level of enjoyment than the reading of the book. She is not happy with everything the books offer her though – I started getting insights into her mind when one day she asked me – what is the name of the boy in the Cat in the Hat book – I said “He is Sally’s brother.” – That was not acceptable to her. Sally and her brother were sitting there when they heard a thump and they saw the Cat stepping on the mat – “Mommy………..Why do they say that? – Are we not allowed to step on the mat? “ I did not understand why she was confused about that – I thought maybe it is my tone while reading – I changed my tones when we get there, but the question did not go away. Why we are not allowed to step on the mat?? I am yet to figure out what she is thinking on this one. What would she tell her Mommy – she would tell that she made a mess and cleaned it up – very truthful! 

One day we reading Clifford’s Christmas right after Cat in the Hat. She found something very strange – in Cat in the Hat, the Cat pats Thing one and Thing two and it is illustrated in the picture. Santa came to Clifford’s house and fell down from the roof. Clifford helped Santa out and before leaving Santa pats Clifford. The patting of Clifford is in the text and not illustrated. So, my daughter swears that Santa did not pat Clifford – “Mommy, he doesn’t. See….He doesn’t.” That is when I realized how difficult it is to write for children, because their imagination and their world is many a time incomprehensible.  

Eric Carle is a great “Picture Writer” and we own most of his books. “The Very Hungry Caterpillar” is my favorite. I believe it is a multi dimensional book through which kids experience the life of a caterpillar, turning into a beautiful butterfly. The way the seven days of the caterpillar’s hungry life is illustrated is awesome. I was thrilled to see the ending to this story. The firefly book is another great one. Then there are the Polar Bear, Brown Bear books…..The one common thing about all his books that we own is that they are board books. They last forever. I read the Polar bear and brown bear books to her casually for a long time. Then one day as I was exploring the books I realized that all the animals pictured were endangered animals. What a neat way to get a message across!

According to Toni you either belong to “Why” or “Why Not” category. She presented a lot of her ideas through the examples of her real life situations which were humorous as well as challenging at times. Listening to Toni reiterated my belief that you always have the opportunity to make a difference. You can either chose to be the “Why” personality or the “Why not” and make a difference.

Toni has challenged all of us to do one “Why Not” thing in the next three weeks and be innovative. I have a new perception of the words “Different” and “Innovation”. I will definitely be looking for an opportunity where I can make a difference and be the “Why Not” person.

I will be very interested in hearing your experiences of being the “Why Not” and how you succeeded in such situations. What kind of innovations have you supported in your work or non-work life? What innovative ideas have you come up with?

Visit http://www.toninewman.com/ to learn more about Toni Newman and her ideas.

Last week, I happened to stay at home for a couple of days since my little one got sick and was sent home from the daycare. Miraculously, the kids start feeling good and healthy the next day – that is another story for another time. Anyway, we are staying home on this snowy day to recuperate.  She wakes up pretty early, goes about doing her morning chores, waves good bye to her sister and father, sits down at the dining table and finishes off her breakfast promptly.

What do we do next? Can I watch Dora, mommy? Well, I need to check my mails at work to see if they dont need me for anything urgent today. Sure, go ahead – she puts the CD in and gets settled into the sofa. tu tu tu tu Dora………her face brightens up. I login to my work email and make sure that I am not leaving any important work (updating my facebook status, checking blog stats in wordpress) undone and not missing any deadlines. Fifteen minutes into it and then I am done.

Mommy….can I have a snack? Can you sit with me in the sofa? Too cute – I put the laptop away and sit down with snacks for both of us.

 Dora and Boots are going on an adventure today – helping the little blue bird get to its mommy who lives in the little blue tree. But they dont know how to get there – so they Consult the Map on how to get to the Little Blue Tree.  Map gives them a few landmarks for them to follow to get to their final destination. Then they begin their journey, sing and dance along, and have fun. Swiper the fox sneaks in and tries to spoil the fun and stop them from completing their adventure – but they deal with him – either by negotiating, or chanting “swiper no swiping, swiper no swiping, swiper no swiping” or by overcoming the hurdle thrown at them by swiper the sneaky fox. Nothing stops them – they continue their journey with the little blue bird. They sing and dance for it when the little bird is scared and crying to cheer him up.

Did I tell you that the little blue bird only speaks Spanish? Yes, so Dora and Boots communicate with the bird in Spanish. They go past the Bananas – they count the number of people, get bananas for all of them, promptly dispose the peels in the garbage cans and move forward. Well, in the episode you will barely notice them disposing the peels off into the garbage cans, but that is something the kids will easily pick up. Then they stop again to see where they should be going next and ascertain that they are in the right path towards their final destination. Dora will help the children jog their memory and figure out that corn field is the next landmark – all along making sure that their assignment is to get the blue bird to its mommy in the little blue tree.

They play with the scare crow as they enter the corn field, let the blue bird lead them through the corn field – they help the blue bird identify the blue path and cross the corn field. Next is the little blue tree. They find the blue bird’s mommy and every one is so happy. Mommy blue bird thanks Dora and Boots after giving the little blue a bird a hug and a special squeeze. Well, their adventure for the day is over and they have achieved their goals for the day. It is time for celebration – We did it, We did it…………

Wow – did you see that? I mean how Dora and Boots teach your kids the principle of life management, team building, mentoring, sharing and having fun at the same time? Dora and Boots never lose sight of their final destination, but always work on the immediate destination. We should work on the near future goals but never lose sight of the long term goal to achieve success. Dora has very good leadership skills – she always let Boots or other companions lead the way or try out things. Dora and Boots never hesitate to ask for help when they need it. Taking advice is not a bad thing at all – bring in the experts when you need that valuable information. Dora and Boots along with their friends work together toward their goal. The team building message in Dora is very strong – undeniable.

The characters always are engaged in adventures and have fun. Fun should always be included in your everyday life even when you are doing important things. For younger kids, there is a lot more to pick up from Dora. For example – associating things together – when Dora is going to the beach, boardwalk is one of the landmarks. Now, kids know what to expect when they are getting closer to the beach. Boots is Dora’s monkey friend – treating your friends for what they are even if they dont look like you. This cartoon teaches kids a lot of Spanish too which stresses the importance of Globalisation and the need for understanding of different cultures.

I am sure the makers of this cartoon are very smart and design the episodes with all these principles in their mind. The kids may not realise it, but they will grasp these principles and apply them in their lives – starting at the kinder garten. I was recently asked for directions to my workplace by a friend and I said follow the food court, go through the car rental, through the sliding doors and you will reach the bank of elevators. Say it with me – Food court, car rental, sliding doors and elevator bank. She later told me that she had no difficulty finding the place.

You now know you dont have to feel guilty about letting the television baby sitting your kids. Just know that they are learning very valuable and important lessons for their life.

When I was growing up, we always sat down on the floor to have our meals. We bought a dining table in the late 90′s in my home so that guests and my grandma who was unable to sit on the floor could have their meals a bit more comfortably. We would sit on the floor like you would for your meditation (Padmasanam). In the olden days, people used banana leaf for a plate. Banana leaves were available in abundance in the backyard and you could always get a fresh one. It was also believed that if you serve your guests in the leaf, you are honoring them. If you think of it, banana leaves are eco-friendly too.

Indians eat their food mostly with their hands, preferrably right hand. This allows you to touch it and enjoy the feel of the food you are eating. The taller you get, it will get tougher to eat in the sit down position because you need to bend more - to let your mouth meet the food in your hand mid-way since you are not allowed to spill the food on the floor.  In most of the houses, men will eat first and the women will have their food later on. And also, men are not allowed to serve the food by themselves. Women will wait on them and serve them as necessary. Women are not equal to men and so they are not allowed to sit down with the men and serve them. They will be standing and serving with their hip bent.  This is a rigourous exercise and the intensity will depend upon the number of men in your household.

Does this sound interesting and funny to you? You should try this at home and see how hard it is to serve people sitting down on the floor. We have hundreds of guests who turn up at weddings and other gatherings and they are all served their meal this way. To make it more interesting for the folks helping you with this exercise by sitting down, serve them soup on a banana leaf. South Indian meals consist of rice and curries that are runny and are fluids.

Now, you know that Criss-Cross Applesauce is the same as Padmasana. This posture is assumed when we do any kind of religious rituals including our Poojas and meditation. When you are meditating, you sit down criss-cross applesauce and keep your back straight. This helps your breath to travel easily and deeply. Your palms will rest on your knees and facing upwards. Keeping the palms open and facing upwards is symbolic of your readiness to recieve.

Times have changed and people do not sit down on the floor for their meals anymore. The middle class have gotten richer and everyone fancies classic furniture and style in their houses. More and more, people find it hard to sit down on the floor even for a special occasion let alone three times everyday for their meals.

Most homes would have a separate area or room in their home for placing the idols and pictures of the dieties. The prayers will also be offered in that area. In Hindu mythology, there are quite a few varieties and forms of Gods that you can pray to. There will be an oil lamp that will be decorated with red dots and flowers. The lighting of the lamp is symbolic of igniting the spiritual lamp inside you. Any Hindu home that does pooja in the morning would have the intense smell of incense sticks, flowers and sandalwood.

The person doing the pooja will chant and offer flowers to all the gods as they chant. The mantras that they will chant will be mostly in the Sanskrit language and will be in the praise of the Lord. When chanted clearly and loudly, each letter of the mantra will create a specific vibration in the environment which is bound to create positive energy. That is why the mantras are created and chanted.

Most Hindus will make a trip to the nearby temple in the morning. The men will visit the temple on their way to work or earlier in the morning. Children will visit the temple on their way to school and they will pray really hard when getting closer to the exams. The temple will have a sanctum sanctorum of the main diety of the temple where only the preists of the temple can enter. It is also symbolic of allowing only the purest forms to come into contact with your soul. One would make three rounds of the sanctum sanctorum of the temple and offer their respects by prostrating before the God. The priest will offer sandalwood paste and flowers to all the devotees. The sandalwood paste will be worn on the forehead and the flowers are promptly put in the hair by the women folk. A visit to the temple makes your soul at peace inspite of anything going on in your life at that time.

I want to talk a little bit about Prostration. You will bend your knee and sit down on your knees and bring your forehead to touch the floor to do this. This is how you would offer your respects to God or any elders in the family. In my house, this is something which will not be compromised. We have to offer our respects to our uncles and aunts when they arrive for a stay and also when they leave. It is believed that everything that happens to you in your life is for good and all the goodness in your life is because of the blessings of your ancestors and elders of the family. In the olden days, the whole big family lived under one roof. These days, it is very rare and people live isolated lives. But when the elders visit, you are supposed to offer your respects and thank them for their blessings. When they leave, you seek their continued well wishes until you meet next time. We would offer our respects to elders also on special occasions like birthdays, when you achieve something personally and professionally  and even when you wear your new clothes for the first time.

I would say the prostrations could be considered Yoga. Everyday, you would do this at least twice, in the morning and evening in front of the dieties at your house. A mother is considered to be the God you can see and hear. So, in many households, people offer their respects to their mother everyday. If you ever did the prostrations before a diety or anyone you would know that it is hard – not physically. It is just hard mentally – you would feel smaller than the other person. In essence, your Ego takes a hit. According to Sri Sri Ravishankar, EGO is Edging God Out – if you nurture your EGO, you are moving away from God. Prostrations make you surrender fully to the other person and leaves you hollow which is the essence of spirituality.

Check this out: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Prostration

 Criss Cross Apple Sauce……………..in Part IV

I came across this interesting piece of information when I was browsing the net for some related information. Thanks Karthik, for sharing this Sudoku-like kolam for prosperity in your website.

My mom draws this floor painting called Kubera Kolam everyday in the pooja altar. She draws a 3X3 square, writes some numbers on it, keeps one rupee coins on the number, puts vermilion on the coins and finally some flowers on them.

When I asked her about the significance of it, she told me it’s called Kubera Kolam and believes that the house will never be short of money. I am not interested in her belief but now more interested in the numbers. The numbers are from 20-28. When we sum the numbers across the rows and columns they always end up in 72, which again boils down to 9 which is considered a divine number.

There is a variation to this called “The Lo Shu Square”, originated from china. This is also a 3X3 matrix that has numbers from 1 to 9. The sum of numbers across the rows and columns is always 15. If you add 19 to every number in the Lo Shu Square you get Kubera Kolam. There is also a big story to it. You can read it here.

Unlike in other parts of the world, guests often show up without advance notice in South Indian homes. So, one need to be prepared for guests anytime of the year, anytime of the day. It will be quite understandable if you think of it this way – When does God visit your house? Do you know ahead of time? We should always be prepared to let God in when He visits. Do you know what God looks like? Are you sure you will recognize him when He appears in front of you? He could come in the form of your friend or relative. That is why any guests who come to your house are treated with respect. In fact, it is expected that you enquire the wellness of your guest, get them seated comfortably, feed them if they are hungry before you ask them of the reason for their visit.

For the same reason, you would not keep the front door of your house shut. You do not want to keep God / Guest waiting at the door. They might get tired of waiting for you to open and leave. Old houses in South India were built in a linear structure – that is there will be room after room in a line. From the front of your house, you can see the backyard. For that reason, you need to keep the backdoor shut. You do not want the Godliness that has entred your house to escape through the back door before blessing you with health and wealth. This is true for your soul as well. Keep your soul pure and open for God. Be aware of the evil forces who do not dare to enter your soul through the heart.

Everyone in the household is expected to wake up early in the morning which is usually before the daybreak. The first thing to do in the morning would be to take a bath and cleanse your body of sins from the previous day. You are not supposed to eat or drink anything before your bath. My mother was very strict about this rule and made no exceptions even when we were feeling sick.

Water is considered to be holy and sacred in Hinduism. It could also be considered as analogous to Baptism in Christianity. Hindus travel to the River Ganges in Varanasi to take a dip in the holy waters and wash away all of their sins. Not everyone can travel to Varanasi in their lifetime. So the holy water is bottled in copper urns and brought back to those who are unable to travel. The urns are sealed and the water is sprayed on the head. The urns are also opened when someone in the household is nearing their death. The urn will be opened and the water will be offered as a drink. This is supposed to help the dying travel directly into heaven without any re-births. The ashes of the dead are also taken to the Ganges and drained into the river for salvation of the dead.

There will be a small verandah or something of that sort in front of most of the houses. This space will be dusted and washed with water everyday in the morning and evening. So, after the bath, the female folk of the house will decorate that space by drawing designs with a fine powder of rice. This is called ‘kolam’ in some of the South Indian languages – also known as ‘Rangoli’ in Hindi. Rangoli is colorful whereas kolam is just with white rice powder. There are some standard patterns that are used by people most of the time. The deisgn gets bigger on special days and occasions. Kolam is considered very auspicious. If a house verandah is not cleaned and does not sport a kolam then, that is probably due to a recent death in the household. So, that is probably not a good time for casual visits and an indication to the guests arriving without advance notice. Old folks say that you should always begin your day by doing a good deed. What is a better deed than feeding hungry?  By putting kolam, ants in the earth get their food for the day since it is rice powder! Also, the posture you need to take to complete this design on the floor could be considered Yoga.

Check this website out for more details on Kolam: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kolam

Pooja, Chanting, Mantras, Prostrations……….in Part III

I was recently asked by a friend whether we (Indians) always practiced Yoga at home and whether we were taught this as young children. We discussed in great length about Yoga and Spirituality in India. I decided to make some random notes about my thoughts on this topic and spiritual practices we had in my home when I was growing up. I will be publishing tids and bits and decided to do it as a series.

My home in India was a typical South Indian Hindu home which belongs to the middle class tier of the society. Most of our neighbors, friends and relatives also fall into this category. My observations and understandings are based on the community that I have described above. There is also a huge difference in culture between the families in South India and other parts of India.

In South Indian Hindu homes, Spirituality and Yoga are instilled in the daily activities and they don’t stand separately from everyday lives. Most of the people do not sit down for a Yoga or meditation session. It should also be noted that most of the customs and rituals of everyday life is multi dimensional – it would have more than one meaning to it.

Someone asked Sri Sri Ravishankar, founder of the Art of Living Foundation about Yoga. He said we all do yoga everyday – we just don’t realize it – when a baby is in the womb, it curls up in mother’s tummy – that is yoga. When the baby is a few months old, it kicks up the legs in the air – that is yoga. When the baby is 6 months or so, it gets a hold of its feet and brings it to the mouth – that is yoga.

Guests, Soul, Kolam…….in Part II

We are all aware that India is working hard to become a Global leader alongside USA and Canada. Trade between India and other global countries are booming and many companies are either starting up units in India or are thinking about it. It is ironical that the automobile industry has seen a great shift to the Indian scene with more and more automobile giants like Ford establishing manufacturing untis in India. The Indian diplomats are very busy these days with visiting delegations and working on trade relations with countries around the world. While this is exciting, it is now time to think about some of the challenges that exist in India.
 

It is Global Road safety week and the infrastructure supported by India is in a bad condition. A report released by UN shows that India ranks second in death by raod fatalities only next to China. Around billion people die every year from road accidents and a million of them died in Indian roads. There are far less vehicles that traverse the Indian roads than the US, bu the fatalities are totally out of proportion. You can read more about the UN report here .

India does not have a great ambulance system that gets the victims to the hospitals in time to save the lives. The demand is higher than the supply owing to the population. The raods are too treacherous and very few drivers follow the safety rules. The police are not viewed as a friendly force like other countries and thus people are scared to come forward, take responsibility and offer help to victims. Private hospitals are not enthusiastic to offer care for accident victims since the involvement of police and courts will directly hit their ratings.

By not thinking about road safety, India is losing one of its biggest assets on which it is building its dreams – its resources. There is no one solution to the situation, but it is a good time to think about following the safety rules and driving sensibly to avoid accidents. A single step taken by a single individual will go a long way in the right direction. Creating awareness about road safety is one of the solutions that can also help to improve the situation.

The first UN Global Raod Safety week is being celebrated from April 23-29, 2007. The theme for this year is young road users. Many youngsters from around the world will participate in a Youth Assembly and discuss how they think the roads can be made safer. More details about how UN is organising the activities for the Global Road Safety week can be read here.